Unpredictable life....
How predictable is my life? If I plan to go to a movie in the evening, what all can prevent me from doing so? If I plan to visit a friends house, what can go wrong? Over the years, I have learnt that everything that could go wrong can go wrong and will go wrong, even if I once doubted it..
I see my life analogous to the traffic on 101 when I go to work in the morning. I am all set to brave the long line of cars near the on-ramp to 101 on a monday morning only to find that I am the 3 car in the line from the metering light. But wait, I have learnt to keep my hopes down , by experience that I was able to get on to 101 this fast only because there was a big accident that was cleared 1 exit down and all the traffic and now piling up in front of me.. One can argue that I have learnt this lesson over the years and should be prepared for it.. Do you think I am not? Of course I am.. So I try to start early, go one exit in the opposite direction hoping that I may get on to the freeway a little faster than my usual exit.. Guess what?? It was just one of those days where everything has to go wrong and it sure did...
Now coming to my life.. I try to plan ahead as much as possible since I am not such a big fan of surprises.. One can call me a non-spontaneous person.. I have learnt, again, over the years, that whenever I try to become one, I have always blown it... Big time.. So I can say that I learnt my lesson.. So whats this got to do with my life being unpredictable? I find that the more I plan ahead of time, the more the chance of it being whisked right under my foot. I have sort of come to an agreement that given the uncertainity of my planned activities, I would rather not plan anything which I know for certain will not happen. Then how do I know what will happen and what will not? Here comes the classic Ferrian Quadro Dynamic multi classification theorem.... Sorry.. I was just kidding..
I have come to accept the fact that my life has become unpredictable over the last few years and I would rather take it by the day. I have no regrets over it except, I did not expect it to happen so soon. I liked the comfort zone of predictability. I hate the fact that I do not have the time to react to the unprecdictable events. Maybe I am not planning it properly. Maybe my plans need some fine-tuning.. Maybe I am just growing tired.. Maybe I am just growing old...
I see my life analogous to the traffic on 101 when I go to work in the morning. I am all set to brave the long line of cars near the on-ramp to 101 on a monday morning only to find that I am the 3 car in the line from the metering light. But wait, I have learnt to keep my hopes down , by experience that I was able to get on to 101 this fast only because there was a big accident that was cleared 1 exit down and all the traffic and now piling up in front of me.. One can argue that I have learnt this lesson over the years and should be prepared for it.. Do you think I am not? Of course I am.. So I try to start early, go one exit in the opposite direction hoping that I may get on to the freeway a little faster than my usual exit.. Guess what?? It was just one of those days where everything has to go wrong and it sure did...
Now coming to my life.. I try to plan ahead as much as possible since I am not such a big fan of surprises.. One can call me a non-spontaneous person.. I have learnt, again, over the years, that whenever I try to become one, I have always blown it... Big time.. So I can say that I learnt my lesson.. So whats this got to do with my life being unpredictable? I find that the more I plan ahead of time, the more the chance of it being whisked right under my foot. I have sort of come to an agreement that given the uncertainity of my planned activities, I would rather not plan anything which I know for certain will not happen. Then how do I know what will happen and what will not? Here comes the classic Ferrian Quadro Dynamic multi classification theorem.... Sorry.. I was just kidding..
I have come to accept the fact that my life has become unpredictable over the last few years and I would rather take it by the day. I have no regrets over it except, I did not expect it to happen so soon. I liked the comfort zone of predictability. I hate the fact that I do not have the time to react to the unprecdictable events. Maybe I am not planning it properly. Maybe my plans need some fine-tuning.. Maybe I am just growing tired.. Maybe I am just growing old...
posted by Siva Balan @ Saturday, October 01, 2005
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